watching the news scares the shit out of me like damn i was gonna go outside to get the mail but now i’m thinkin twice
(via fuckyeahloldemort)
hello students. welcome to my math class. we will be having a class trip this year, the first ever math field trip in history. it’s to hell. here we are
(Source: galaxys4, via fuckyeahloldemort)
i’m that friend that has to walk behind the others when the sidewalk doesn’t fit a group of three
I think about this post a lot
(via raisinbagels)
William Shakespeare (via morgan-freemans-voice)
(Source: ohmyitspie, via ryloism)
i dont know if people are checking me out or shocked at how ugly i am
(Source: marinasexual, via raisinbagels)
Talent must be a fanatical mistress. She’s beautiful; when you’re with her, people watch you, they notice. But she bangs on your door at odd hours, and she disappears for long stretches, and she has no patience for the rest of your existence: your wife, your children, your friends.
She is the most thrilling evening of your week, but someday she will leave you for good. One night, after she’s been gone for years, you will see her on the arm of a younger man, and she will pretend not to recognize you.
"